2001

My mum passed away on 23^rd of April 2001 at around 7am. We now had to arrange for the burial. She really looked different after a few days in the Mortuary. I chose her dress and the color of her coffin to be white. We boarded the Hearse bus and were on our way to her home in upcountry. 

We were fine until we reached our home town. The whole village seemed to have been expecting us because we heard wails as we approached the homestead. It brought tears to our eyes and now the whole bus was wailing. According to tradition, the coffin was placed just outside her house. 

We sat up until late as the grave diggers finished their job and we set up a tent for a service the next day. The following day, May 5^th 2001, we had a service conducted by one of the pastors who led a church she attended. We viewed the body for the last time and the journey to the grave begun. The distance was approximately 2 meters but it seemed like 100m. People sang funeral songs as the coffin was being placed in the grave. We had to place flowers in the grave as the children and I remember a thorn from the bouquet got stuck on my dress so I was struggling to get it out as they waited for me. I finally placed mine in then we threw in some soil and allowed the grave diggers to finish their job.

We went to the house and as usual there was alcohol as my relatives got drunk. My grandmother was very devastated. She kept wailing for a while before she was escorted back to her homestead. I had to come back to Nairobi immediately since school had resumed.

School was not easy for a few days as everyone would offer their condolence. I would break down once in a while but I tried to be strong. A classmate had also lost her brother during that holiday so it was really hard for us but we pulled through.

I now had to move to Pamela’s as she was paying my fees and I needed change. I thought the grass would be greener since our mother had passed on. I also had no one to run to when I needed to unwind from the hard times at Susan’s place. Grace opted to stay behind though. Life at Pamela’s was different. Her first born daughter, Christine and the second born son Nick were older than me and the last born Dickson was younger than me by two years. We were both in high school. She also lived with my cousin called Jacob who was very quiet and the youngest. Their house was much bigger and they ate a lot of food, well quite a variety compared to what I was used to. Her husband was very loving and the children loved him.

Pamela was loud and very authoritative. She never took time to talk to her family live alone me. She got angry very quickly, rarely smiled or joked. One thing that reminded me of my mum, she was an alcoholic. She would go out over the weekend and come back home late when we have all slept.

 She worked in Arusha Tanzania, with the UN and travelled every weekend back to Kenya.

Once she took us for holiday in Arusha. I was very excited. We stayed at her house. It was me, Dickson and Jacob. The husband later joined us there. We took walks, spent our Christmas there, and ate a lot of roasted and fried chicken. I still remember the taste of it like it was yesterday.